6 Ways to Overcome Relationship Anxiety

Relationship anxiety refers to feelings of worry and doubt within your relationship. You might feel insecure within the partnership and constantly wonder if things are okay. You might also assume the worst, telling yourself that you’re not good enough for your partner or that something minor that you disagreed on will be the final straw for your relationship.

Relationship anxiety often stems from childhood attachment issues. But, no matter how long you’ve been dealing with it, there are ways to overcome it and enjoy happy, healthy, meaningful relationships. 

Let’s cover a few of those suggestions.

1. Identify the Source

If you believe your relationship anxiety does come from childhood attachment issues, that’s not the easiest thing in the world to deal with. Many people with those attachment issues try to “push down” what happened to them. Or, they might not recognize the problem unless it’s brought up by someone else.

Thinking back to negative issues from your childhood can be difficult, but it’s the necessary first step when it comes to healing. When you identify the problem at the source, it’s easier to move forward. 

2. Be Firm in Your Sense of Self

Relationship anxiety can often cause someone to feel like they lose their sense of identity. It’s important to be firm in who you are. 

That doesn’t mean you can’t accept little changes in life. Relationships are about compromise. But maintain your independence where it counts, and don’t compromise your core values. When you stay true to who you are, you’re less likely to feel insecure within the relationship.

couple holding hands with only arms showing in photo

3. Practice Mindfulness

Relationship anxiety will often convince you to focus on the “what ifs” in your relationship while getting you to assume the worst. Instead of letting those thoughts take over, be more mindful. Mindfulness is more than a buzzword. It’s the practice of staying in the present and can be a wonderful tool to combat anxiety.

When you start to feel overwhelmed, close your eyes and focus on taking slow, deep breaths. Keep your focus on the present by listening to the sounds around you and becoming more aware of how you feel at that very moment. Thoughts will continue to come in. Let them pass you by without grabbing onto them.

By practicing mindfulness each day or whenever you’re feeling anxious, you can remember what’s real in the present without worrying about the past or future.

4. Be Honest About Your Feelings

Open, honest communication is essential for any healthy relationship. But it might be even more important when you’re dealing with anxiety. Don’t hesitate to tell your partner how you’re feeling. Chances are, they’ll want to do whatever they can to help. You’re in this together, and they’re likely to give you what you need on a regular basis if you express to them what those needs are.

5. Address Conflicts

When you have relationship anxiety, you might be tempted to ignore conflicts or disagreements because you’re too worried about what they might bring. 

But the sooner you address conflicts, the better. Arguments can actually be very healthy within a relationship when handled the right way. The longer you wait to address something that’s bothering you, the worse it’s likely to become. Plus, keeping things inside can serve as fuel for your anxiety. It’s better to get it out in the open.

6. Talk to a Professional

If your relationship anxiety won’t ease and it’s having a negative impact on your partnership, consider reaching out for help. Anxiety therapy will make it easier to get to the root of the issue. Plus, you’ll learn healthy ways to continue overcoming your fears.

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